The freezing rain crashes on my bedroom roof and at night I can not get to sleep.
Luke can't hear anything.
Maybe I am too close to the window and it can't be closed properly. It is annoying, VERY annoying.
Perhaps the catch on the window is loose. Dad or me needs to tighten it up so I can not hear anything, that would be better and then I can get to sleep instead.
Then I can come to school nice and bright and ready to learn.
Luke can't hear anything.
Maybe I am too close to the window and it can't be closed properly. It is annoying, VERY annoying.
Perhaps the catch on the window is loose. Dad or me needs to tighten it up so I can not hear anything, that would be better and then I can get to sleep instead.
Then I can come to school nice and bright and ready to learn.
Hi Tyjian
ReplyDeleteNice job. It's hard to get to sleep. I hope you get to sleep tonight!
I like it how you wrote that you or you dad need to tighten the window!
From Sam
What a great piece of writing. I know exactly how you feel when the rain keeps you awake.
ReplyDeleteHi,
ReplyDeleteYou've done a great piece of writing here. The first two lines are my favourite - very engaging. The best thing about writing is that you can explain in detail all the little thoughts floating around in your head, and share your experiences with others (just as you've done here). Have fun with your writing!
From Viv
I like the word picture you have made with the " ....freezing rain crashes ...". The feeling you evoke with the repetition of "annoying, VERY annoying." describes how I found the door at my house in that wind last night. Reading your writing sparked my memory. Writing is a fun way to share something you experience. I hope you share more of your writing.
ReplyDeleteHi I love your writing, especially the part of the 'freezing rain crashes on my bedroom roof.' This is exactly what it is like! I'm going to share your writing with some kids in my class on Monday so they can be inspired to describe in their writing, as well as you do.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this great piece of writing! Melva Gill Teacher at Discovery 1 School.